It is with pure joy that I am able to announce to you all that we passed court today!!! I am humbled by all of the prayers said to our God almighty for our family! Thank you for loving us and supporting us!
We did not even know that we had a court date today! So this has come as a complete shock and a miracle has been worked through the amazing staff of CCI in Ethiopia!
I have found that lately there have been a lot of new followers to my blog. So I thought that I will go a head and give a total back ground of our life and how adoption has changed EVERYTHING!
About 2 and a half years ago my husband Darin and I lost a pregnancy. It was a pregnancy that came really easily. We only "tried" for about 2 months when we found out that we were expecting! I was over the moon excited. All I had ever wanted and ever dreamed about was being a mommy. I carried the pregnancy for 3 months. We went in for my 12 week check up and we still could not hear a heart beat. The Dr. scheduled a ultra sound and we found out that the baby had stopped developing at about week 3 or 4 but my body kept supporting the fetus as if it were growing. So the Dr. gave us 2 options a D&C or I could wait until the pregnancy ended itself. There was a lot more and it got pretty ugly, but in the end we ended up having a D&C and that ended up being a botched procedure.
We then spent the next 9 months hopelessly trying to get pregnant. I have to say that was honestly the lowest of lows in my life. I obsessed over being "pregnant." ...I would lay awake at night and my mind would wonder and I would think to myself... " OK if I got pregnant this month that would make the baby due in July, if the baby comes in July that will mean he will have a summer birthday and won't get to celebrate it's birthday with it's class mates. .. Eww that would mean I will be pregnant during the hottest months... I wonder if it will be a boy or a girl... I wonder if it will have Darin's eyes or my blond hair, I wonder if it will get my blue eyes or Darin's brown eyes... I wonder if the baby will sleep well, I wonder what we will name it, I wonder what sports it will play, I wonder...I wonder... I wonder...
It went from wondering to being mad!! I was so mad after each month we would realize we were not pregnant!! Then I would lay awake and think ...We did everything right...I checked for when I was ovulating...I did not drink...I did not smoke...(I never smoked anyways :) ) we were healthy... we listened to ALL of the advice that EVERYONE seemed to have on getting pregnant..Why were we not getting pregnant!?!?!?! I was at my absolute wits end. I would lay awake sometimes all night long, crying... tossing thoughts around in my head.... and then cry some more...
Until one night, after about 9 months of all of this, I heard the most clear, God spoken words in my life..."You do not need to get pregnant to be a mother."....
That changed everything!
The amazing thing about that and how I so clearly know that was our Father speaking to me was the plain and simple fact that I was over whelmed with being pregnant!! And when I was at the absolute end and I could take no more and I know in my mind I could of never came up with anything else but being pregnant God spoke into me to adopt.
I woke Darin up and told him what had just happened and then I went and wrote everything down from that amazing night!
I went from being totally consumed with getting pregnant to becoming a mother. And I realized that those two things, pregnancy and being a mother, did not have to go hand in hand. I started praying again and turned all of my worries to God. That Sunday we went to church. Our pastor was preaching on the healing power of God. And all of the hate and anger I had melted away. I was released from my suffering and my focus became outward instead of being absolutely inward!!! God moved a mountain in me!
From then on adoption is all we have known! We signed on with an adoption agency 3 months later we had our referral.... Dollame
and 3 months after that we were FOREVER a family!! August 23rd, 2009.
Claire has been home for a year and a half. She brings so much joy and love into our lives and we praise God everyday for allowing us to be called her mommy and daddy. Present day, January 27th, 2011.
Now we are patiently waiting the home coming of our next two children. Stella and Benjamin, it has been a long hard fight. I have found my faith in God being tested but again and again he has proven His faithfulness by providing a peace that is unimaginable. Sometimes the feelings of all of this failure reminds me of trying to get pregnant. There is nothing I can do to change the out come and so I am reliving some of those emotions. We have had 3 failed court dates and are still waiting to hear when our 4th will be. All we want is to be reunited with our children and have our family whole!
So we are waiting for the next chapter in our lives. We want our children home!! It is unbearable at times... but there is also peace in know that God's plans are bigger and better then we can imagine. So please continue to pray for our family.
Emotionally is sure does not get any easier the more court dates that fail. We still do not know when our next one will be. Please Pray it is successful and quick! I would if you would be willing to comment any words of encouragement today!
Claire just can not take the pressure of all of these court dates any more!!!!!!! It is time again, and the excitement is building. We have our 3rd court date on Monday the 24th. We are praying 3rd time is a charm. Thank you again for all of the words of encouragement as this has been one of the most stressful times in our lives. It is sometime unbearable when we think about the fact that we received our referrals when Ben was 6 weeks old and Stella was around 8 weeks old. They are now both almost 10 months. So with that said we are hoping to have them HOME before they are a year old, but my hopes are not too high. There is peace in knowing that God has amazing plans for them and we know with out a doubt that they will be here is His perfect timing! So please continue to pray as our next court date approaches! Thank you!
This is taken off my partner in loving the worlds blog :) I love how she describes our love and passions for Africa.We are starting a nonprofit to support Africans here and abroad, and it will be called Awake and Alive. www.daniellesdance.blogspot.com
I also wanted to say how crazy excited Jolene and I are about Awake and Alive!!! Seriously!!! I think we would get an A+ for passion. However, we're working hard to do other stuff other than just dreaming. We're working on a website, a blog, the paperwork (that would be Jolene's awesome husband, Darin, actually), our board, making connections with other organizations doing great things in Ethiopia (Bright Future and Project Mercy, for example), making connections with organizations here doing great things for Africans (like the Red Cross Refugee Services, for example), gleaning wisdom from friends in other non-profits with hearts for Africa, contacting Africans living in the area, inviting them for dinner, hearing their stories/ideas....you get the point. A lot is going on! Until the other blog is up and running...and even when it is...we'll be keeping you posted here.
All this is going on while the Shrocks are praying desperately to pass their THIRD court date on January 24 (or 22nd. Now, I'm second-guessing!) They have had 2 in a row with disappointing results. I am in awe of how strong they are being. Jolene's words: "I know these babies WILL be home when they are supposed to be!" Pray for them, please.
If you want to get involved, let us know. We would love to share our vision with you. In the meantime, I think we've settled on an official mission statement (unless it changes before we get the website up :) ):
Awake and Alive desires to support Africans locally by building relationships and helping them acclimate into American society. Abroad, we wish to support existing organizations on the ground in Africa. Finally, by providing education and experiences to the Church we aspire to encourage Christians to be a part of the solution for the poor.
I thought with all the "blah" that has been happening this cute video of Claire will lighten the mood. This is a video of Claire. She is overly tired and we had family over so she was getting a lot of attention. And this is how she was acting. Oh and yes some one does say, "Oh no I think she is going to throw baby Jesus." We have a nativity scene and Claire love to carry baby Jesus around. :)
Hi there. I just wanted to post a quick note that we did not pass court again. This is our second attempt. Our 1st court date was Dec 22nd. And yesterday morning we found out we did not pass again. And it seems like there was a misunderstanding with some paperwork and we are praying that there is some clarity soon so this can be resolved and we can pass court and then move on to trying to get through the US embassy... Thank you for all the prayers!
Today in Ethiopia they are celebrating Christmas! We received a wonderful gift yesterday!
You see we did not pass court when we traveled to Ethiopia because our Dossier (ALL OF OUR PAPERWORK) had been lost. I was at an absolute loss! We are using the same dossier that we used to adopt Claire and it expires in February. So when we were told that our paper work was misplaced I thought we would for sure have to start over and redo all of our paperwork!!! I had been sending out prayer request to everyone I knew! Even the oh so amazing Ordinary Hero Organization posted a prayer request for us 2 days ago. I Emailed Kelly Putty on the morning of the 4th. I was shaking I was so at the end of my emotional rope! I told her what had happened and asked if she would use her amazing network of adoption advocates to pray for our case! She had it posted on her blog early that morning at about 1 AM and we received some great emails and comments on our blog encouraging us to stay strong and know that God is in control! That same day at 3pm received a message from our adoption coordinator that our paperwork has been found and that everything should go through on the 13th!!! So we received an amazing gift from God! Thank you Lord!
PS Claire and I then spent about 30 minutes with the CD player as loud as it would go and we were worshiping, singing and dancing!!! :) I am normally the one laughing at her when she is dancing but I am proud to say that I had her cracking up at me!! :)
Today is a hard day. I was not sure why but then I looked at the calendar and it has been 2 weeks since we found out that we did not pass court. That might be part of it. But I think the hardest part is that is has been 2 weeks since we have seen our Baby Ben and Sweet Stella. I can not put in to words the experiences and emotions that we had over in Ethiopia. People are always asking about the trip and I do not mean to be rude or flat but I just do not know what to say. Some times I feel as if it were a dream. I see the pictures of us with the babies but it is hard to remember being with them. I think it would be easier if we had passed and we would know that our case is moving forward. But we are 7 months into having our referrals and we are at the exact spot we were in June. There is my little rant, my sad side. But on the other side of those feelings there is SO much to be thankful for!!! We have Claire home and she is more then a blessing!! We still have our referrals! Ben and Stella are healthy and growing beautifully! We do have another court date set for less then 2 weeks. January 13th. (pray we pass) Darin and I have a wonderful strong marriage. We are setting up a not for profit to help African families here and abroad! We have amazing family and friends who are helping support us! And there is also much joy and peace in knowing that God has bigger plans for us and our babies then I could ever dream of! I know there is reason for waiting. But still....( as one of my CCI friends put it) it physically hurts not to have your children in your home, tucking them in, reading bed time stories, kissing them constantly, rocking them, watching them grow, and just being part of their little lives, when it is purely a matter of paperwork. Please continue to pray for our family as we hold on tight to this roller coaster of a journey to become a family!! PS I would love if you would leave comments, words of encouragement would be greatly appreciated.
Introducing Stella Marta and Benjamin Fikadu.
